One of the biggest issues that so many sugar babies face is having to give up some aspect of their personal life, their privacy, or even their integrity in exchange for money. It can be a hard truth to face up to, but when personal services are provided in exchange for cash, the situation can seem alarmingly similar to prostitution. Many sugar babies therefore feel that there is a degree of compromise involved in making money via their chosen profession, and the implications can be intolerable.
You can insist–as many modern sugar babies do–that sugar dating doesn’t necessarily have to be associated with prostitution. Nor does it have to have some sleazy or otherwise unsavory connotation. But the fact of the matter is that many people still tend to have a negative impression of sugar dating, and sugar babies are often on the receiving end of the criticism.
Take Lena, for example. An intelligent and vivacious woman in her mid-20s, Lena could easily make a living doing any number of other things. She has a degree in accounting for one thing, and she has an entrepreneurial spirit that enables her to support herself quite comfortably without having to rely on any man. It is only her love of adventure and interest in living life to the fullest while still young that has led her to become a sugar baby.
“I was making a pretty good salary as an accountant at a major shipping firm,” Lena said. “But I was getting a bit tired of the 9-to-5 grind, and I was eager to take a break. I decided that being a sugar baby was a great way to continue to live the lifestyle that I had gotten accustomed to, while still keeping my options open for reentering into my chosen career.”
Lena clearly has her head on straight, and there is no doubt that she will find a life outside of the sugar dating world eventually. Unfortunately, she has had to put up with some less-than-savory comments from people she knew–even friends and family.
“I was shocked when I was propositioned by a guy I knew at work,” she said. “He isn’t even that much older than me, so I didn’t think of him as ‘sugar daddy material’. It turns out he wasn’t interested in being my sugar daddy either. He just heard that I was a sugar baby to an older guy, and he automatically assumed that I was willing and available to tumble into bed with him and with anyone else for that matter!”
An older relative was just as clueless and judgmental. “My parents have been amazingly open and supportive of the whole thing,” she said. “But an uncle of mine chanced upon me and my sugar daddy at a restaurant one night. After putting two and two together, he realized that I was in fact a sugar baby, and he didn’t take the news very well.”
“This uncle ran into my parents later on that week,” Lena continued. “And he quickly told them about the incident and exactly what he thought about me. He basically asked my parents if they knew that I was an “escort” as he put it, and he wondered out loud why any parent would put up with such a daughter.”
“My dad was ready to punch him out right there!” said Lena with a laugh. “Thankfully, my mom was a lot more levelheaded, and she made it clear to my uncle that I was in an exclusive relationship, and that the rest wasn’t any of his business.”
As distressing as that incident may have been, Lena doesn’t hold any grudges against her uncle or anyone else that might have an inaccurate perception of sugar dating. “Most people simply don’t have a clue about what goes on in the sugar dating world,” she said. “I make it a point not to be with more than one sugar daddy at a time, and I strive to be discreet at all times.”
What about sex, we ask? “As far as I’m concerned, sex is something that may–or may not–happen between two adults, depending on what they agree on,” she said. “I’ve met a few guys that automatically assumed that they were getting a sex toy for the price of supporting me financially, but I quickly shot that notion down. If they can’t accept that sex will only take place on my terms, either they are out of the door that very minute or I am!”
Lena also emphasizes the importance of being your own person. “I’m very much my own woman, and I simply won’t take any nonsense from anybody,” she said. “Sure, I may be available to serve as your dinner date or your plus one on social events, but we have to agree on a schedule beforehand. Dropping by unannounced is simply unacceptable, and you can forget about those 2 a.m. booty calls as well!”
“A good rule of thumb that I always make sure to communicate with any new sugar daddy is that I expect to be treated like a steady girlfriend,” Lena said. “Think of me as your virtual girlfriend if you wish, but don’t assume that I will drop everything–panties included!–just because you are supporting me financially. You are paying me for the privilege of my company and my care and attention, but I do have my limits.”
In closing, Lena has this to share with other women that are considering becoming a sugar baby. “It can be difficult to find the right sugar daddy at the start, especially if you get the reputation as a ‘hard ass’ or a ‘bitch’,” she said. “But sometimes you really do have to put your foot down and be a bitch if you don’t want people taking advantage of you. Be true to yourself, set your boundaries, and never compromise your ideals. Over time, you could have a rewarding life as a sugar baby without feeling that you have compromised yourself in any way.”